From School Avoidance to Success: My Daughter’s Story and Why We Need More Schools Like This in the UK

For the next few years, this will be my new work setting for a few days each week. It’s a nice spot, but not quite the same as being in the office with the team. Still, I wouldn’t change it for the world because this shift has come with something far more important—a huge change for one of my favourite people.

My eldest daughter, has struggled to attend mainstream school for the past four years, and it felt like she was on track to be unable to sit any of her GCSEs. We were completely lost. Her state school did everything they could, but like so many others, they simply didn’t have the resources to meet her ASD needs, as she didn't have an EHCP. 

Then, just a couple of weeks ago, everything changed. 

Thanks to the incredible work of the View school and the team at Valley Park school, she has just started at a new specialist school designed for girls like her. A school that, quite honestly, we need a lot more of in the UK.

This school supports 15- to 17-year-old girls who struggle with mainstream education for various reasons, and the impact on my daughter has been nothing short of transformational. She’s now in a class of just eight. She has the same table just for her in every lesson. The rooms are dimmed slightly (because bright lights can be overstimulating for many neurodiverse children). She will never have a supply teacher. These might seem like small details, but for her, they are game-changing. So much so that the girl who once refused to go to school, and let alone sit an exam has just completed her Year 11 mocks—in a brand-new school, in her very first week.

This is the same child who used to shout, throw forks, slam doors, and regularly tell me she hated me. The change in her is almost unbelievable. Of course, there will still be challenges, but what I’ve learned—particularly from experts like David Cashman and his trauma-informed approach that small adjustments can make a huge difference for neurodiverse or traumatised children.

Before, just the thought of school left my daughter overwhelmed and dysregulated before the day had even begun. By the time she got there, her capacity to learn—or even communicate—was already at zero. As David explains, she was spending all her emotional "credits" just getting through the morning. But now? Now, she has credits left in the bank. She isn’t consumed by the fear of navigating a large, busy school.

Now, she can learn. She can communicate. She can make friends.

I didn’t start youHQ because of all this—she was only diagnosed years after we launched—but my journey as her parent, alongside growing this business, has made me acutely aware of just how much our education system needs to change. Especially for SEN learners.

And yet, the reality is frustrating. As the head teacher at the View has pointed out, the school only exists because a larger school funds it, and it loses money every year. It’s not hard to see why—small class sizes, no supply teachers—it doesn’t fit within current budget structures. But that doesn’t mean it isn’t necessary.

Right now, there are so many children who don’t meet the threshold for an EHCP but still have significant needs that make mainstream schooling impossible. These children deserve an education that works for them. They deserve the chance to thrive.

So to any other parent out there with a child struggling in mainstream school—whether due to neurodiversity, trauma, or emotional-based school avoidance—please keep pushing. Schools like the View do exist. And every child deserves an education that meets their needs, not one that forces them to fit into a system never designed for them.

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If you’re struggling to find the right education setting for your child, I’d be happy to share what I’ve learned along the way. Feel free to reach out.